Thursday, October 13, 2011

Why doesn't she like me?

From the time we are little girls all we want to do is fit in. We want everyone to like us. We want to be friends with all the little girls around us. Have you ever walked into a room and you smile at everyone there, but there is one who turns from you and you end up thinking, "Why doesn't Peggy like me?" We can do everything in our power to try to get someone to like us. We can go above and beyond. We go out of our way to be pleasant, but there are still those people who are not going to like us. See, instead of focusing on all those who did speak to us, we concentrate on those who didn't.

It hurts, doesn't it? When you know you have been nice and reached out, but they don't reach back, it is downright painful. Last night a woman gave me a hug and it was as all I could do not to say, "You don't have to do that." Why? I know she doesn't like me. I have been on the end of her gossip many times and it hurts. Sometimes I just want to ask, "What did I do?" For me, I know what I did. I was part of gossip that touched her ears and she made a choice to believe it, instead of seeking the truth.

We waste such time wondering, "Why doesn't she like me?" Sometimes we know that person doesn't like us, but other times we just assume and that is a line we don't want to cross. Many times, that very person we think doesn't like us, in fact does and they are wondering the same thing about us. Too often than not we have communication gaps with others. We think if they don't make the effort to reach out to us they don't like us. Well, what did we do to reach out to them? We must get to that point in life that it's okay if everyone doesn't like us. We are not going to be best friends with everyone. There are going to be people who drive us crazy. Some we will just not like at all. It doesn't mean we don't have to love them. It just means we don't have to concern ourselves trying to find reasoning why everyone doesn't like us.

Sometimes we try to reach out and there is no love in return. Friends, we gotta get to that place in life where we are content with who we are and we find ourselves complete in Christ. We just love with all our heart whether love is returned or not. It's not an easy thing to do, but we can walk away knowing we did everything we could to make a difference.

We gotta wake up and love those people who are surrounding us. We must walk with joy in our heart and have an attitude that reflects the love of Christ. Be encouraged by those who want to be around you. Be inspired by those who share their life with you. Don't waste your time worrying about who does and doesn't like you. When we waste our time on those thoughts we are giving room for Satan to invade our thoughts. We need to be more concerned with our relationship with Christ. If we are truly seeking Him, He is all we need. He will fill us completely. We won't be searching for others to fill our needs. Christ is after all the greatest friend we will ever have. No one can take His place.

We have parties and invite everyone we know and when only a few show up we wonder, "Why didn't Angela come? Is she mad at me?" We serve in areas at our local churches or in our schools and want others to join us in serving and growing as women. Ladies, we can't be concerned with who isn't there, but lets concern ourselves with who is. For those who choose not to attend a party or a gathering we have, lets not sit back in wonder, but just send them a little note saying, "Missed you and hope your having a wonderful day."

Sometimes others really do have other plans. Sometimes what we are doing really isn't an interest to others. It doesn't mean they don't like us. It just means they want to do something else with their time. We gotta remember we are all in different places in our lives. We are all different people. We put so much thought into areas we just need to let go of and give to the Lord. You know what I mean? Just because we are so excited about an event, doesn't mean the Lord has called others to attend. Love those who are there and be present and whole.

Friendship is something beautiful that we all long for. If we are blessed with one good friend then we are blessed in deed. We just need to be that kind of friend we want to have in our own life. We need to remember to give grace. We expect so much from others and they just simply aren't able to give us all we need. People are going to let us down. Not on purpose, but because we are imperfect. We cannot meet every need of every person. When we are content within our own life we aren't searching for others to fill it. Our emptiness can be made whole only by Christ Jesus.

“This is my commandment, that you love one another as I have loved you. Greater love has no one than this, that someone lay down his life for his friends. You are my friends if you do what I command you. No longer do I call you servants, for the servant does not know what his master is doing; but I have called you friends, for all that I have heard from my Father I have made known to you." John 15:12-15

"Whoever walks with the wise becomes wise, but the companion of fools will suffer harm." Proverbs 13:20

"Put on then, as God’s chosen ones, holy and beloved, compassionate hearts, kindness, humility, meekness, and patience, bearing with one another and, if one has a complaint against another, forgiving each other; as the Lord has forgiven you, so you also must forgive. And above all these put on love, which binds everything together in perfect harmony." Colossians 3:12-14

"Iron sharpens iron, and one man sharpens another."  Proverbs 27:17

Instead of us worrying about who likes us lets just be likable people. Our circle of friends will forever change. God brings new friends into our lives as we grow. Friends will come and go, just as the seasons change. We just need to be true to ourselves and allow the Lord to shine through us. We must remember, we are not going to have everything in common with all people, but for those we do, we can find joy and make time for them. It's those friends around us that we can settle in with for a great cup of coffee and a chat that will bless our socks off.

We need to be more concerned with our vertical relationship (with Christ) more so than our horizontal relationships (with the world). When we are good with Him, then we are centered and everything has it's perfect balance.


Lord, thank You for those special people, friends, that You have placed in my life to encourage me and lift me up through love and laughter. Help me to be the kind of friend that I want in my own life. May I be accountable for my actions when I am not friendly to others. Open my eyes to new friends and help me to get out of my comfort zone and meet new people. Forgive me for when I take those special people in my life for granted. For each person that passes me along my journey, may I be able to take a nugget of blessings away to cherish forever.
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