Wednesday, May 18, 2011

I must believe

What happens when you hurt? You hurt others. What happens when there is no forgiveness? You are slowly being eaten away like a deadly cancer. What happens when one tells lies about you? It feels as though you have a canker sore on your tongue. When someone is in attack mode the natural thing for us to do is be in defensive mode.

What happens when you think everything is going wonderful, but you wake up one morning and it feels as though the earth has stopped spinning? Maybe the axis broke and everything is just standing still. Have you been there too? You shake your head. You try to stand from the shock, but what do you do?

I have found myself asking God, "Okay, where are You?" Really. I see Him in everything around me daily. I am amazed by Him, but today I find myself just wondering what He is up to and where He went, because things are just not right. But all of us could say that in some sort of way today I am sure. We could look into the lives of our own families, our circle of friends, our work environment or just turn on the news. Pain is everywhere. Nothing seems to make sense anymore. Just when I think all is right, something goes haywire and I find myself standing asking, "How did that happen?" It's like being on a merry go round. Your going at a nice speed. The breeze feels good and then someone comes out of no where, grabs hold and begins to spin you faster and faster until your hanging on for dear life. One leg is hanging over, swinging in the wind as your hands grip tighter and tighter, until you can't hang on any longer and you fly off spinning through the wind, landing flat on your face.

We all have a voice, we just have to find it. We have to use our voice with integrity and honor. We must stand in the truth even when others choose not to stand by our side. There is a time to fight a battle and there is a time when we must walk away. Choosing which move to do is quite like playing chess. One wrong move and you have lost altogether. I don't want to be right. I just want there to be peace. I just want to find that place, that day, where all is right.

I look at Jesus. I see His life as He walked and lived among those who didn't believe. He walked past those who chose to scorn Him and spread lies that would scatter like blowing tumbleweed. We never see an instance where Jesus screamed He was right. We never see in instance where He fought just to prove a point. He knew He stood in the Truth and that was all that mattered. He didn't cast out curses and try to destroy those who didn't believe. He knew the Truth could and would stand on it's own. He knew there were battles, but He too knew that His God was bigger than any battle or any scorn cast against Him. He walked in love no matter what. No matter the cost. He gave all. He was willing to pay the debt for a world who didn't believe.

I find myself praying, "Please come today. Please return to us today. Please take us home away from all this pain." Is that selfish? My heart hurts so badly. There is so much pain in this world. We have so much to carry. The weight is overwhelming. I want Him to come today, but I too want everyone to be ready and so many are not. We have a world dying because they choose to live for themselves, the god of selfishness. We choose to pass Him by. Why? Why can't we just see that He is here and HE is all we need?

I just want to feel His love today. I want to feel His arms wrapped tightly around me. I want to hear Him say, "Everything is going to be okay." I have to trust Him. I have to believe that He has a plan and a purpose for each and every thing that touches my life or else nothing makes sense. Even when I can't see past today, He can. He can make miracles happen. He can bring peace from war. He can restore brokenness and make it whole. He can take what we have shattered and piece it together making beauty appear where we only thought destruction was possible.

I must believe that God meant it for good. I must believe or else what do I have? A mess without hope. In faith I must believe there is hope. I must believe all is possible with God. If not, what do I have? Where are you today? Is there something at your door trying to drag you out of your comfort? As a door closes there has to be another that opens, right? If not we are left with no way out. God always makes a way!

As I stare my hurt in the face today I don't know what will happen. If I give in, I will be destroyed. Satan would love that, wouldn't he? Ah, but I am not giving in. I am not giving up. I am going to battle. Not with words or anger, but with the Sword of the Spirit and all the grace before me I am falling to my knees. I am going to face this battle on my knees and I know as well as Satan, there is nothing more powerful than a child of God in prayer. God gives power and grace in our time of need. He sets before us all we need. We just have to reach for it. We must believe in Him. We must stand in Truth.

See, those attacks that come are not from God. He allows them, yes. But, they are from Satan. He is wanting to destroy us. He wants us dead. If not under six feet, he wants us walking dead. He wants us to turn from our faith and to find our self weak in the battles around us. We must stand knowing God is here. He is present and He is working in the scenes behind the battle, in front of the battle and behind us. He has all ground covered. He isn't leaving us along to fight this world. We can over come. We can choose to walk in the same grace and mercy given to us. We must choose forgiveness and peace. We must wake each day believing in the God who came to save us. The God who lives within us.

Let your tears fall. Let your pain out. Don't try to carry it all alone. Don't pull the cover up over your head and hide from the call. Get dressed. Choose to see the sunshine out your window and grab on to every single blessing you find. Don't let the wrong overshadow the right. We might fall, but we don't have to stay down. We can stay down on our knees until we find Jesus and until He gives us the strength to stand once again. He will. He does. He is. Believe my friends. Believe in the Truth of our Mighty God.

"My little children, let us not love in word or in tongue, but in deed and in truth. And by this we know that we are of the truth, and shall assure our hearts before Him. For if our heart condemns us, God is greater than our heart, and knows all things." 1 John 3:18-20

"Behold what manner of love the Father has bestowed upon us, that we should be called children of God! Therefore the world does not know us, because it did not know Him." 1 John 3:1

"Be sober, be vigilant; because your adversary the devil walks about like a roaring lion, seeking whom he may devour. Resist him, steadfast in the faith, knowing that the same sufferings are experienced by your brotherhood in the world. But may the God of all grace, who called us to His eternal glory by Christ Jesus, after you have suffered a while, perfect, establish, strengthen, and settle you. To Him be the glory and the dominion forever and ever. Amen." 1 Peter 5:8-11


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