Everything looks different in the dark

Well, it was another weekend with my husband traveling to Chicago. You know, I am quickly falling in love with this city and the people. In meeting up with my husband on Sunday night, around midnight, I found myself once again lost. Yes, I seem to find myself lost all the time. Well, let's not say lost. Just maybe taking the wrong turn. I seem to know about where I am, but just can't find the right turn to take me to where I need to be.

I  give a ring to my husband and say, "Um, I have made a wrong turn somewhere." He knows me all too well. He ends up saying to me, "Just stay where you are and when I get there you can follow me on in." I cannot tell you how much comfort that brought to this girl that is forever making wrong turns. Now, why didn't I just think of that in the first place? Why not follow the one who knows the way? Why do I forever try to do it on my own when the way doesn't seem familiar?

"Show me the right path, O Lord; point out the road for me to follow. Lead me by your truth and teach me, for you are the God who saves me. All day long I put my hope in you." Psalm 24:4-5

Do you find yourself making the wrong turns in life like me? I seem to think, "I can make it just fine", and right about that time I find myself at a dead end and trying to find a place to turn around.

Now, my husband has a built in GPS. The man is never lost. Even if he makes a wrong turn, he can simply get back to where he was and correct himself. Me? I am not blessed with that. It seems I can go the same road quite a few times and still find myself going the wrong direction. Especially at night. Everything looks different at night.

"You light a lamp for me. The Lord, my God lights up my darkness." Psalm 18:28

Once coming back home on Tuesday morning, he says to me, "Look hon, I will show you how to get in. I know, everything looks different at night." He showed me and said, "Now, where did you make a wrong turn?" I couldn't even tell him. I had no idea where I messed up. Just like my life where sin sneaks in. It comes in when I'm not looking. It sneaks in when darkness is around. See, where I must meet my husband there is no light. No light at all. So, it's very easy to miss the turn. How many times have I done this in life? Goodness, too many times to count. Just one light would make all the difference in the world. When there is light, everything in darkness is illuminated! We can find our way by following the light.

Now that I have been shown how to get there in the light of day I believe I can find my way in the dark of night.

"The Lord is my Light and my salvation, so why should I be afraid? The Lord is my fortress, protecting me from danger, so why should I tremble?" Psalm 27:1

When I make a wrong turn I find myself coming to tears in fear of where I am going to end up. My husband is teaching me to just be still and calm while I think about my grounding. What is my grounding? To trust in the Lord. Trust in His guidance and keep focused on Him and Him alone. It's when I seem to take my eyes off of Him, my destination, that I lose my way.

"Wait patiently for the Lord. Be brave and courageous. Yes, wait patiently for the Lord." Psalm 27:14

When I can't seem to find my way in life I am learning to just stop and pray. Stop and seek out my Lord who knows my path and knows just what road I need to travel to get there. Now, not every road is as scenic as another. Some journeys seem to make us smile and others we find ourselves pondering how in the world we got there and now, how in the world are we going to get back to where we were. It's when we slow down and remain calm that we can notice all the detail around us. Even though the scenery is different, we don't have to panic. We can still take great joy in the journey.

"Those who fear in the Lord are secure; he will be a refuge for their children." Proverbs 14:26

The Lord will illuminate the path before us when we have our focus open Him and not the circumstances around us. My husband asked me, "Honey, why in the world do you get so upset when you can't find your way?" That took me some time to ponder. Is it the complete and utter fear of the unknown? Maybe not finding my way back to where I began? To that I must tell myself, I cannot fear the unknown. I must trust in the Lord to guide my path and all that comes before me. There is no faith in fear. If I trust in Him, He will always light my path. No matter where I am, He will guide me back to Him.

"Trust in the Lord with all your heart; do not depend on your own understanding. Seek His will in all you do, and He will show you which path to take." Proverbs 2:5-6

It was just a bed

From the time I can remember my mother made my bed for me. Once I was up and she made my bed I wasn't allowed to get back on my bed. Something so simple, but yet it has affected my life still today. Do you know at forty-four there has not been one day of my life that has passed without making my bed? Seriously. Of course, except for those days that I am sick and in bed, but still yet, I cannot have a wrinkled bed.

Now before you go thinking, "This girl is crazy", just hold that thought for a bit. Okay, you still might walk away thinking that, but you might have a better understanding as to why. It seems we all carry baggage from our mothers of some kind. I am wondering what baggage I have passed on to my own daughters. Yes, from the time I was little until I was in high school, my mom made my bed. She too cleaned my room, picked my clothes up and did absolutely everything. Once my room was cleaned I wasn't allowed to mess it up. I know my mom loved taking care of me. She loved doing things for me and my dad, but in doing so, it left me with a feeling that nothing I did was ever good enough.

I would try to make my bed and she would just come in and take the sheets off and do it again. Do you know I never even made cookies with my mom? Never baked a cake. Never cooked a thing until I left home. Now, there is a first dinner to talk about. She was one of those moms that simply did everything. She was always working and staying busy. Our home was spotless.

I would ask if I could help in the kitchen and she would say to me, "I will do it. I will get it done quicker and you will only make a mess." To me, I heard, "I don't need you in here and you can't do it anyway." My mom was the oldest of all her brothers. As she grew up she cared for them and helped her mother in the home. Being poor cotton pickers from Arkansas, my mother knew what work was. I love my mother with all my heart. I treasure her love. I just don't think she realizes the impact she made upon my life. I grew up feeling very insecure about myself. Always wondering what others thought of me and if I was doing something good enough, which I knew I wasn't. I found myself either struggling with trying too hard or just giving up all together.

When I get up every morning the first thing I do is make my bed. I feel like my house is a mess if my bed is not made. I have caught myself going by my bed and straightening the quilts. My husband knows this battle going on within my heart. Praise the Lord he understands this quirkiness, because even though I am writing it, I still can't understand. But, it is true. Our childhood has a lasting impact on our life. If we are not made aware of the things that affected us so, we too will pass them on to our children.

If you would walk into my son's room you would know he has not been affected. LOL His bed is not made every day and I do not walk in and make it for him. Now, when my girls were at home, they made their bed every day. Their room was always clean, but they played like little girls. My son's room was filled with Legos and trucks and cars of all kinds. I taught my children when they were small to pick up their toys when they were done. I didn't want them to feel like I did. I felt like if I touched something it would get dirty.

I can tell you the first time I made cookies was with my own children. My husband taught me how to cook. Thank goodness for his amazing skills in the kitchen. My children had this little cookbook and it is stained with chocolate still today.

I know my mom would be in tears if she knew. I have never shared these feelings I have with her. How could I? I would break her heart. But, how can I just continue to hold them in? I think after all these years I am finally realizing and am able to gently let go. I might even hold some anger and bitterness tucked in there deep. I don't have memories of baking and crafting with my mom. I wasn't even allowed to decorate the Christmas tree. I remember one year she was allowing me to put up icicles. Remember those? I was so excited I just opened up my hand and began tossing them across the tree. My mom took every single one down and replaced them herself. Again, what I had done was not good enough.

How do you get over that? How can you heal from that feeling of being unworthy? There are times I think of my dad and wonder, "Daddy, are you proud of me?" I know he is. I know he would be thrilled with how his little girl turned out. But some how there is still a pain there. See, I never heard the words, "I love you", from my dad until his last days. Of course, I knew my dad loved me. But those words were words he just never spoke. He came from a family that didn't share. They didn't even hug. I cannot imagine not hugging my son everyday. Maybe that is why I made sure my children were told every day that I loved them and I always made sure I placed my arms around them each day. My son still hugs me each night before he turns in for bed. I never wanted my children to wonder.

I thought I just might share. I thought I would be totally transparent. Why? Because I know there are others out there carrying baggage that is getting heavier by the day. We hide it deep within so no one sees. But each and every time I walk past my bed I remember. That's why I reach out and straighten the wrinkles so the quilt is smooth.

But see, I too remember my Savior chose me! He chose me! I didn't have to be perfect and He knows I am not and He loves me anyway. He created me with love and I am created in His image. Can you imagine that kind of love? That is crazy love, isn't it? There is no other love like His. I can envision myself upon His lap and I can hear His words of encouragement and love. I long to hear Him one day say, "Well done my daughter." But until then I know that He loves me. Not because I am perfect or imperfect, but just because I am me. He loves me when I make a mess of things and when I fall down flat on my face. He is always reaching out to me and always accepting of me as His child.

See, it takes time to unpack sometimes. For me, it has taken years, but I am unpacking one piece at a time and slowly healing is coming. Whenever I feel unworthy I hear my Savior's words, "You are My daughter." My husband knows when I am feeling as if I am not good enough and having a hard time. He too is quick to remind me, "You are a daughter of the King of kings. You are a royal blue blood. You have a heritage that goes beyond anything we ever expected." See, it's not my unworthiness, it is His worthiness.

"I will praise You, for I am fearfully and wonderfully made; Marvelous are Your works, and that my soul knows very well. My frame was not hidden from You, when I was made in secret, and skillfully wrought in the lowest parts of the earth. Your eyes saw my substance, being yet unformed. And in Your book they all were written, the days fashioned for me, when as yet there were note of them." Psalm 139:13-16

"You did not choose Me, but I chose you." John 15:16a

"I have been crucified with Christ; it is no longer I who live, but Christ who lives in me; and the life which I now live in the flesh I live by faith in the Son of God, who loved me and gave Himself for me." Galatians 2:20

STAINED GLASS HEARTS by PATSY CLAIRMONT

Patsy Clairmont writes with a style all her own. As I read her words I can hear her voice. Even through the tears of brokenness, there is always laughter with, Patsy. She is real and honest. In her latest book, Stained Glass Hearts, she shares the brokenness that has touched her life. She shares of hard times that she has emptied herself and called upon God. I love how she can take an object, such as a stained glass window and compare our lives to it.

I must share one of my favorites. It is a poem written by Pixie Foudre.

Browsing the dim back corner
Of a musty antique shop
Angels flew out from the pages
I caught the whiff of a soul
the ink seemed fresh as today
Was that voices whispering?
The tree of the paper still grows.

Patsy shares story after story of brokenness and healing. This book is unique in that at the end of each chapter, she shares The Art Gallery, Poem and Prayer. She too shares music she loves. The best part? The entire book is filled with scripture entwined within her stories of how God brings light to the very darkness and fear that seems so real in our lives today.

What I love about Patsy Clairmont is that she is relatable. She knows the brokenness that touches our lives and she too knows the healing hand of the Savior. If you are stuck in a rut and searching for a new perspective this book is for you. It is an easy read and one that I loved.

This book was a gift from Thomas Nelson for it's review.

Standing together in faith and friendship

Okay, how blessed was Daniel? I mean really, he was surrounded by friends who were not only great examples, but stood by his side in faith. To have that circle of friends can give you the encouragement and inspiration you need to make it through any situation.

"Hold on to the pattern of wholesome teaching you learned from me-a pattern shaped by the faith and love that you have in Christ Jesus." 2 Timothy 1:13

I was taking some time reading in Daniel and it was his relationship with his friends that stood out to me in the very first chapter. They all had a strong faith in God and they walked that faith. I mean, here they are together and all of a sudden they are thrown into a scary situation. All throughout the story of Daniel you see no fear from these young men. King Nebuchadnezzar would have scared the daylights out of me, but for these young men they stood firm in their faith. At no point were they even disrespectful or rude. They remained kind and compassionate even though their entire lives were changing before their eyes.

"Be thankful in all circumstances, for this is God's will for you who belong to Christ Jesus." 1 Thessalonians 5:18

They were selected because of their stature, strength and wisdom. These were good-looking men. Wise young men. Men with faith that is not wavering. I look at our world today and see how difficult it is for young adults trying to find their way in the world, but were things really all that different for these young men? I think the difference is they were focused on God. They were dedicated to Him and were ready to surrender all for their King of kings.

"Walk with the wise and become wise and become wise; associate with fools and get in trouble." Proverbs 13:20

So, these young men are held captive. I wonder if they were even able to say good-bye to their families. They are now being trained to learn the Babylonian language and literature of this time. They were to be trained for three years then they would be ready for royal service. Can you imagine? This king wants to change everything about these young men. He even changes their names! Daniel is now called Belshazzar. Hananiah is now called Shadrach. Mishael is called Meshach and Azariah is now called Abednego. These Hebrew men are facing change of every kind. Nothing is the same, except one important aspect of who they are. They are children of God. Their faith remains therefore they are complete in Him and Him alone. Nothing else matters to them. They could have ended up anywhere. Their faith is so strong. I want a faith like that. I want that unwavering faith that remains even in times of fear and change. They had no idea what was facing them.

"'For I know the plans I have for you', says the Lord. 'They are plans for good and not for disaster, to give you a future and a hope." Jeremiah 29:11

I too look at Timothy. He had a wonderful friendship with Paul. Paul was his accountability partner. He was his teacher and example. They were friends who could talk, laugh and walk this road together, lifting one another up in encouragement. I love these words:

"Preach the Word of God. Be prepared, whether the time is favorable or not. Patiently correct, rebuke, and encourage your people with good teaching." 2 Timothy 4:2

"But you should keep a clear mind in every situation. Don't be afraid of suffering for the Lord. Work at telling others the Good News, and fully carry out the ministry God has given you." 2 Timothy 4:5

That too is what, Daniel, did. He walked with his friends in faith, knowing that God had a plan and they were safe within His hand. Friends must love one another enough to correct each other when we are wrong and love them enough to give them your heart. These friendships were lasting because they took time for one another. They didn't put each other off. They made themselves available.

These young men were great because of their faith in God, but also in the fact they had godly friendships. They had friends that were willing to stand with them and not cause them to stumble. Can you imagine the late night talks they had? The laughter and closeness that brought them through the days of struggle?

Look at David and Jonathon, Ruth and Naomi, and Elijah and Elisha. These were great and lasting friendships.

"There is no greater love than to lay down one's life for one's friends." John 15:13

We can look to these powerful friendships for our example. We must be the kind of friend we want to have. We are blessed with the most amazing friend of all, Jesus Christ. He gave His life for you and me. He will walk with us through every season of life. He is the Friend of all friends. The wonderful thing is, He chose us! He chooses us for a friend. That should make us feel overwhelmed in love. To be called His friend should be the greatest compliment of all.

"You are My friends if you do what I command. I no longer call you slaves, because a master doesn't confide in his slaves. Now you are my friends, since I have told you everything the Father told Me. You didn't choose Me. I chose you." John 15:14-16a

Find yourself condemning other believers?

A few weeks ago I found myself on facebook having a discussion with other believers on the subject of believers being attacked for standing up for what was morally right. Now, mind you. I am not speaking of believers and unbelievers. I am totally speaking about believers in this post.

After that discussion, and I must say there were some heated comments, my heart just never had peace. I mean here were believers and we simply couldn't agree. A few days ago I opened my bible and as you can guess the Lord led me right to where I was to be. Here is what I read.

"Accept other believers who are weak in faith, and don't argue with them about what they think is right or wrong. For instance, one person believes it's all right to eat anything. But another believer with a sensitive conscience will eat only vegetables. Those who feel free to eat anything must not look down on those who do, for God has accepted them. Who are you to condemn someone else's servants? Their own master will judge whether they stand or fall. And with the Lord's help, they will stand and receive his approval. In the same way, some think one day is more holy than another day, while others think every day is alike. You should each be fully convinced that whichever day your choose is acceptable. Those who worship the Lord on a special day do it to honor him. Those who eat any kind of food do so to honor the Lord, since they give thanks to God before eating. And those who refuse to eat certain foods also want to please the Lord and give thanks to God. For we don't live for ourselves or die for ourselves. If we live, it's to honor the Lord. And if we die, it's to honor the Lord. So whether we live or die, we belong to the Lord. Christ died and rose again for this very purpose-to be Lord both of the living and of the dead. So why do you condemn another believer? Why do you look down on another believer? Remember, we will all stand before the judgement seat of God. For the Scriptures say, 'As surely as I live,' says the Lord, 'every knee will bend to me, and every tongue will confess and give praise to God.'" Yes, each of us will give a personal account to God."   Romans 14:1-12

If we have accepted Christ as our Savior that makes us brothers and sisters, not enemies or judges of one another. Each of us, although on the same journey, are all on different paths with Christ. Our walk with Him is personal. What one finds okay, another might feel conviction. For instance. I do not like Harry Potter or the vampire series of books. For me, I feel conviction. But for another? Maybe they see the good verses evil. Maybe they can walk away with a message of gold. It isn't for me to judge another for what they are reading. I have friends who love this stuff and they are some of the most special people I know.

We all enjoy different music. I do not always have my radio attuned to the Christian station. I love all kinds of music. Yes, when I feel convicted over a song, I change that station. There are some things I refuse to listen to. But music is soothing to the soul. We are all different and do not have to enjoy the same things. That is what makes us unique. Just as in church. Some enjoy contemporary music as others are more traditional.

Now, do we accept sin? Of course not. But we accept our brothers and sisters in Christ no matter what walk they are on. There are days I wake and I know I am right where I am to be with Christ. Then again, there are days where I wake and start my day with Christ no where in sight. I am off doing my own thing. We look at others and say, "How could they do that?" Too many times we walk with a holier than thou attitude of our brothers and sisters. Many times we do walk as if we are better than another. Maybe we grew up in a Christian home. Maybe you are like me and didn't come to know Christ until much later in life. When we point a figure at another brother or sister in Christ we are in judgement of them. No wonder it is so hard for unbelievers to come to know Christ. Believers cannot even get along. We must make a choice. Simple as that. That same grace we want from our Savior we too should be willing to give to another. The same goes for forgiveness.

We can find ourselves dividing over an issue, when in fact we must come to the place in love where we can agree to disagree. Friends, as long as we can agree on Salvation, does anything else really matter? If we believe that Christ died for our sins and rose again on the third day, does anything else really matter? It doesn't matter if we worship on a Saturday night or a Sunday morning. Whether we wear a dress to church or find ourselves in shorts and flip flops, does it really matter? We get so caught up in what everyone else is doing wrong we forget what doing right is. We comment on those folks who don't find themselves in church every Sunday or open their bible every day. Friends, it is not for us to be in judgement of another. We are all in different places with the Lord.

All we must do is be genuine in our faith. All we must do is focus on our personal relationship with Christ and allow everyone else to be on that same personal journey too. I can open my bible and read something I know I read years ago, but in this moment I find myself being overwhelmed in His Word. I find myself reading His message and it speaks straight to my heart as when I read it the first time it didn't have that same affect on me. Why? Because I am in a different place today than I was then.

We should be able to walk on this journey and have our brothers and sisters cheering us on along the way, not pointing fingers behind our backs. I think at some point we can all feel judged by other believers. Some choose not to partake in watching television. That is their personal decision. We love to point out what we think others are doing wrong, but in that same sense we forget our own sin we are committing. Some how we all seem to think we are right and the other is wrong. Shame on us. Shame on us. On the day we meet Jesus face to face, it will not be those holier than thou church members standing side by side us with Jesus. They will not be in judgement of us, nor we of them. It will be Jesus and us. We will not be standing pointing fingers and making excuses. Our mouths will be completely shut for once in our lives and we will stand and listen to the Lord as we are held accountable for every word and action of our entire life. Still want to point fingers at another? That makes me want to concentrate on my walk with Him.

God convicts us all in different ways and at different times. We must respect one another and show love. It isn't so much about issues as it is in worshipping and praising our Savior together as believers. We get caught up in whether one is Baptist or Non-Denominational. You know what we do? We begin to make up our own man made rules and aspect everyone to follow the way we believe or the way we would do something. It isn't what we believe, my friends. It is God's Word. It isn't what I would do in a situation. It's what Christ would do in a situation.

May we give one another room to walk this journey and may we too be able to hold hands as we walk this journey getting to Christ on a more personal level than ever before. As Christians we must remember we are sinners in need of a Savior. The only difference in us and the world as that we have accepted we are sinners and we are in of a Savior. That does not in any way at all make us better than another. As Christians we are going to make mistakes. I make mistakes on a daily basis. Being a Christian doesn't mean we are sinless. Only Christ is sinless. But on our journey we try to sin less. May we never look to another and think we are far better Christians because we have known Christ longer. Each of us have a story. We each have our own personal testimony and there is not one that is more important. We are children of the King of kings, Lord of lords. It is time we open our arms to our brothers and sisters and stop judging those we sit next to in our pews.

"So Let's stop condemning each other. Decide instead to live in such a way that you will not cause another to stumble adn fall." Romans 14:13

Little Shop of Horrors and a Message of Sin

This past Saturday my cousin and I went to The Muny in St. Louis to see, "Little Shop of Horrors." I had searched for the details of this movie and wondered how they would turn this movie into a musical. Now, to begin, if you have not spent an evening at The Muny, you are missing a great experience. It has become our summertime tradition. I too had read a few reviews of this musical and most said it was a great production. A few said they really didn't enjoy it.

I have never seen the movie and honestly, I was never really interested. It just sounded like something that wouldn't grab my attention. In short version here is the story line: We find a flower shop on skid row. A flower shop that is about to go under. Who on skid row has money to purchase flowers? The shop owner has two employees. A young woman who is captivating to say the least. She is the girl every young man wants, but her heart belongs to a man who is not treating her like a young woman should be treated. He is physically and mentally abusing her. The young man working in the shop knows this information. He would like to tear apart this overly cool character, but he is that young man who doesn't really see himself as much and no way sees the potential of what he could be.

This young man creates this plant. He could have been the greatest botanist ever, but he doesn't have a high regard for himself. After all, his parents are long gone and the shop owner has raised him. What does he have to offer? So, he creates Audrey II. Naming her after the beautiful, Audrey, that he has fallen for. He feeds this plant. It's just a little thing to start out with. This little plant has an appetite. The young man begins feeding this plant his own blood. Pretty soon the plant is growing  and bringing in money. Everyone wants to see the great Audrey II and it's creator. People are amazed and want this young man on every show and paper known to man. He finally has a name for himself. The world is finally standing up and taking notice of who he is.

Pretty soon this plant needs more from this young man. So, he begins feeding him more. He begins with the boyfriend from hell, but that isn't enough. Soon, he too feeds him the shop owner. The very man who took him in and cared for him. Now, he is left to only gain more, but soon the plant also eats the girl he loves and in the end eats him also. At the end, the young man, tries killing the plant, but it has grown too large and has overcome the young man who started with only feeding it a little at a time. Soon, every home in the world has one of these plants as they have spread to reach everyone.

Now, there are a few places I would have changed things around, but then that would not have been the original story. I too pondered the thought, "Not every story has a good ending." Many times we simply cannot add nor take away from a story. It is what it is and we have to live with it, or rather die with it. Sin is nothing to play with. The more we feed our flesh the more our flesh desires.

This was the perfect picture of sin for me. As I sat and watched I pictured this plant as sin. At first it was just fed little by little and the young man wonders how he got to this position. Well, he got there one sin at a time. He allowed his worldly wants to overcome who he really was. All of his desires were coming true, but look what it cost him. Not only did his sin touch his life, but those around him. The greater this sin became the greater it desired. The more we feed our sin the greater it grows. Sin brings nothing but death. Nothing good can come from it. That is why I realized this musical ended just the way it should have. In the end this young man gave his life to the sin that seemed to start out so very small.

"For the wages of sin is death, but the gift of God is eternal life in Christ Jesus our Lord." Romans 6:23

"Do not be overcome by evil, but overcome evil with good." Romans 12:21

Just like the character, Seymour, we all crave what this world has to offer. We are missing something and we are searching to fill that void. Sadly, we assume that "stuff" will fill that void, but only the love of Christ Jesus can make us whole. Only He can complete us. Audrey was searching for love. A love she didn't know. She too was searching in the wrong place and once there in the grip of this man, she didn't know how to escape. Everyone in this production was searching for more. It's just the things they thought would fulfill them brought nothing but horror into their lives.

"For the love of money is a root of all kinds of evil, for which some have strayed from the faith in their greediness and pierced themselves through with many sorrows." 1 Timothy 6:10

This plant (sin) needed blood to survive. Seymour was willing to give his own blood and soon he was willing to give the blood of others to meet his wants of this world. Sin is costly. We don't think of the cost and that is exactly how Satan tricks us. Christ Jesus gave us life through His death. Through the blood of Christ, He cancels out all sin and makes us whole when we turn away from our sin and toward Him. We must search no more.

"For the grace of God that brings salvation has appeared to all men, teaching us that, denying ungodliness and worldly lusts, we should live soberly, righteously, and godly in the present age, looking for the blessed hope and glorious appearing of our great God and Savior Jesus Christ, who gave Himself for us, that He might redeem us from every lawless deed and purify for Himself His own special people, zealous for good works." Titus 2:11-14

I love when I can walk away from something with a message of hope. If we turn from our sin and the evils of this world and stay focused on Christ, He will give us strength to overcome our temptation. Once we identify that sin we can lay it at the feet of Christ and return to it no more. Temptation often doesn't have the booming voice as Audrey II has. Sometimes it's just that little whisper that pulls us in. We try to ignore it, but it's still there, calling. We can answer that temptation with a big, "NO!", just by keeping our eyes on Jesus.

"I say then, Walk in the Spirit, and you shall not fulfill the lust of the flesh." Galatians 5:16

"Set your mind on things above, not on things on this earth." Colossians 3:2

More than a jar

This morning I found myself reading about Elisha in 2 Kings 4:1-7. Just love how the Lord moves through His Word. It truly is His Living Word that reaches into the depths of our hearts leaving us with a greater wisdom of the knowledge He has laid before us.

Here we find the story of the widow and the oil. Now, this woman, again her name is not mentioned, is facing a dilema no one should have to face, but in our world, we must face trials and sometimes we are lost at what to do. So we find ourselves then crying out to God. Perhaps for the very first time.

This woman is widowed and she is left with a debt to pay. Can you imagine selling your children, in this case two sons, into slavery to pay your debt? She is literally left with nothing of material gain, but she has something far greater. Faith!

"A certain woman of the wives of the sons of the prophets cried out to Elisha, saying, 'Your servant my husband is dead, and you know that your servant feared the Lord. And the creditor is coming to take my two sons to be his slaves.'" 2 Kings 4:1

Can you see the fear on her face? Can you imagine the pain in her voice? A mother that loves her sons is now having to face giving them up for a debt she cannot pay. We now hear the conversation between the widow and Elisha.

"So Elisha said to her, 'What shall I do for you? Tell me, what do you have in the house?' and she said, 'Your maidservant has nothing in the house but a jar of oil.' Then he said, 'Go, borrow vessels from everywhere, from all your neighbors-empty vessels; do not gather just a few. And when you have come in, you shall shut the door behind you and sons; then pour it into all those vessels, and set aside the full ones.'" 2 Kings 4:2-4

Now, I read this scripture over and over again and had an "aha" moment. Elisha is telling her to go and borrow vessels. EMPTY ONES. This is important. God wants us to be empty vessels so He can fill us and keep refilling us day after day! He even told her not to just gather a few. So, he wants her to gather as many as she can. Then it's as though she is shutting the door behind them on all their fears of yesterday.

"So she went from him and shut the door behind her and her sons, who brought the vessels to her; and she poured it out. Now it came to pass, when the vessels were full, that she said to her son, 'Bring me another vessel.' And he said to her, 'There is not another vessel.' So the oil ceased. Then she came and told the man of God. And he said, 'Go, sell the oil and pay your debt; and you and your sons live on the rest.'" 2 Kings 4:5-7

What a picture of obedience and faith. Every jar was filled. Not only was the debt paid in full, they had enough left over to live on. Can you see the goodness of God in this picture? He paid our debt. Not in part, but fully paid our debt. We owe no more because of the gift He gave. Through that gift are debt is not only cancelled out, but we can live forevermore in abundant joy! Can you see the peace wash over this family? God provides!! We never have to fear and live with doubt. We can be sure that when we live in faith and surrender ALL to God, He will provide every need.

But there is more to this story. As I read and studied this scripture, there too is the story of Elijah and the widow! Coinsidence? I don't think so. In 1 Kings 17:8-16 we again witness a story of great and mighty faith from a widow. Now in this story we find the widow and her son with only enough food for one more meal. Have you been there too? There is nothing in the fridge and your checkbook statement tells you the account is empty, but there in our greatest time of need, God shows Himself and provides once again.

Here in this story with Elijah, he goes to the widow's home and asks her to fix him a meal. I can see the expression upon her face. I would be asking, "So, you want me to make you a meal when my son is hungry?" Lets read.

"And Elijah said to her, 'Do not fear; go and do as you have said, but make me a small cake from it first, and bring it to me; and afterward make some for yourself and your son. For thus says the Lord God of Israel; 'The bin of flour shall not be used up, nor shall the jar of oil run dry, until the day the Lord sends rain on the earth.'" 1 Kings 17:12-14

When we give God our first fruits He will bless us for our faith. Even when things are tough. Even when we don't know what the week will bring, when we tithe our first fruits to the Lord, He will meet our every need! When we place God before all we are on the receiving end of His mighty mercy and grace. Don't you love that? God has met our needs and we have never gone without our needs. This is important. God meets our needs. He doesn't always meet our every want. But He has a way of blessing us with much more than we ever expected.

We find this widow obeying and from her obedience we see her faith renewed. Each and every morning as she went to that flour bin it was never empty and her jar of oil never ran dry. God supplies! It shows us just what God can do with a little. We see story after story of how He provided for those who loved Him. You might be sitting here today fighting worry over your circumstances. There is no circumstance too big for God. He is not without knowledge of our every need. I have been in awe of His greatness over these past three years of how He continued to provide. Today my husband has a wonderful job and he is actually making more money than the previous job he was laid off from. God has a way of working everything for the good of those who love Him. Just seeing Him provide for us in our hardest times only increases our faith and brings us closer to Him.

"Trust in the Lord with all your heart, and lean not on your own understanding; In all your ways acknowledge Him, and He shall direct your paths." Proverbs 3:5-6

"Be anxious for nothing, but in everything by prayer and supplication, with thanksgiving, let your requests be made known to God; and the peace of God, which surpasses all understanding, will guard your hearts and minds through Christ Jesus." Philippians 4:6-7

"And my God shall supply all your need according to His riches in glory by Christ Jesus." Philippians 4:19

Really, right there in the middle?

I was reading through Genesis and as I came across Genesis chapter 3 a question leaped out at me. First let me share the verse with you.

"'Of course we may eat fruit from the trees in the garden,' the woman replied. It's only the fruit from the tree in the middle of the garden that we are not allowed to eat. God said, 'You must not eat it or even touch it; if you do, you will die.'" Genesis 3:2-3

Now, Eve, is being tempted here and she is trying to prove her case as we all do when we are tempted. Funny we can change things around and make every excuse for why we should other than why we shouldn't. But what stands out to me is this. Why did God place that tree in the middle of the garden? I mean right smack dab in the middle? Why not place it off in the corner some place where they wouldn't see it daily and be tempted by it? I must say I have been pondering this question.

"The Lord God placed the man in the Garden of Eden to tend and watch over it. but the Lord God warned him, 'you may freely eat the fruit of the every tree in the garden-except the tree of the knowledge of good and evil. If you eat its fruit, you are sure to die.'" Genesis 2:15-17

My thoughts? Well, our lives are surrounded by temptation. Where is temptation usually? It isn't in the corner of our life, it is right smack dab in the middle of everything! Was God making a point here? Have I totally been missing something?

"Therefore, dear brothers and sisters, you have no obligation to do what your sinful nature urges you to do. For if you live by its dictates, you will die. but if through the power of the Spirit you put to death the deeds of your sinful nature, you will live." Romans 8:12-13

We battle temptation daily, sometimes moment by moment, but the amazing thing is, as we are faced with temptation in the middle of everyday, we can fight it! The Holy Spirit gives us all we need to move away from it, turn from it, and leave it in its tracks.

We are no different than Eve. Oh sure, we try to say we are, but we are tempted just as she was and we make excuses placing blame on others. Oh, how we love to point the finger when we fall into sin. Eve was blaming Adam and Satan and Adam was blaming Eve and Satan. Satan is not called the prince of lies for nothing. He is the great deceiver. We are deceived by the temptations that are in the middle of our day to day lives.

"Do not love the world nor the things if offers you, for when you love the world, you do not have the love of the Father in you. For the world offers only a craving for physical pleasure, a craving for everything we see, and pride in our achievements and possessions. There are not from the Father, but are from this world. And this world is fading away, along with everything that people crave. But anyone who does what pleases God will live forever." 1 John 2:15-17

Eve was craving the fruit. Not fruit from the good tree, but fruit that would bring death. How long do you think she enjoyed that bite of fruit before she was wishing she had never taken a bite? Just like us, right? We give in, but for a second and that sin we thought just minor and mighty enjoyable for a few minutes brings much that we were not looking for. Isn't that how sin works? It isn't lasting, but the effects of it are. Sin is lasting. It doesn't just touch us, but everyone around us. Death? What kind of death was God speaking of? There is physical death and spiritual death. We can be walking dead. We can be sitting in our church pew every Sunday dead as can be. Sure, our heart might be beating, but we don't have a pulse. Sin is sin. Temptation is not sin. Only when we give into it does it become sin.

We might ask ourselves, "How in the world did I get to this place?" One sin at a time. We can awaken from our spiritual death by turning from that sin. We must acknowledge the sin. Ask forgiveness of the sin. Pray for strength to over come the sin and courage to turn from the temptation to do it again. Our flesh is weak. Satan knows each and every weakness. Why do you think he throws temptation in our face at our weakest moments?

"God blesses those who patiently endure testing and temptation. Afterward they will receive the crown of life that God has promised to those who love Him. And remember, when you are being tempted, do not say, 'God is tempting me.' God is never tempted to do wrong, and he never tempts anyone else. Temptation comes from our own desires, which entice us and drag us away. These desires give birth to sinful actions. And when sin is allowed to grow, it gives birth to death. So don't be misled, my dear brothers and sisters." James 1:12-16

That temptation right smack dab in the middle of our lives will do everything it can to have us give in to it, just as Eve did. We can fight temptation. It doesn't have to lead to sin. When we are tempted might we remember the promises of God and know that what He has for us is lasting! There is a fruit we are to eat of. There is a fruit we are to multiply in our lives. If we stay focused on that and place it in the middle of everything we do, it will give strength in those times of our weakness. The more we put it on and the more we share it, the more blessings there are to flow right in the middle of our lives!

"But the Holy Spirit produces this kind of fruit in our lives: love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness, and self control. There is no law against these things!" Galatians 5:22-23

There's love in them actions

We face the day with trepidation. We want to soar, but we are not quite sure we can make it off the the ground. We wake wanting to feel refreshed and all we feel like doing is crawling back under the blankets. No one really knows what we are facing. We have kept quiet for so long. We don't want others knowing. We don't want pity. We just need love. We need someone to care. Does anyone care?

Just think what would happen if all we did was love. I mean really unselfishly love those around us. We would see friends soar. We would witness miracles happen as people threw off their worries and grabbed a hold of the hope that is no longer out of reach.

Think you can't encourage another? Is it just not your gift? I think we just don't think we can be of much help. What would we say? We can all encourage. It's simple. Send a text of just, "Hello, I'm thinking about you." Email one across the miles. Pick up the phone and let another hear your voice of compassion. Send a card to make one smile. Ask a friend over for lunch. Hop on in your car and visit that girl friend you haven't seen in ages. Give a gift certificate to a favorite restaurant. Share a favorite book that changed your life. Just give of your time. Time shows another you love them. Reaching out shows one you care. Most importantly pray for that friend in need. You never know just what your one act of encouragement will do for another. God has perfect timing and He wants you to allow Him to move through you. He wants us to be His hands and feet. Encouragement is a gift we all could use more of. Don't you think? Encouragement brings life to a troubled soul and gives us the motivation to make it through one more day. One more hour. One more minute. Open your heart to another and see just what God can do with a little of your time.

E Elevated

N New

C Courageous

O Over-Flowing

U Unity

R Rejuvenated

A Alive

G Grateful

E Equipped

M Mighty

E Excited

N Nurtured

T Thankful

Searching for direction

If you have stopped in on a Friday you may have noticed there was not a Lets Chat spot appearing. I want to share with you that Lets Chat isn't over, it's just on hold for a bit. I love Fridays and I love interviewing people. This highlight has been a rich blessing in my life, but it is time I take a step back for a bit and look at the view. Not my view, but God's view.

I have been spending time in prayer asking God, "What direction do You want me to go?" I haven't heard a definite answer yet, so I am waiting and trying hard to be still. When you love to write, or maybe I should say, when writing is your passion, it's pretty hard to sit back and wait. He hasn't told me to put my writing on hold, but He is asking me to expand my vision. I jot down everything that seems to have meaning. I have all these notes and it's like trying to put a puzzle together. Finding where all the pieces fit is not always easy. It is a journey and I gotta say, as I sit back and try to soak it all in I find a great assurance in the fact that God is doing the leading. I just want to make sure I do the following.

See, I am not sure if I am to move into Fiction or Non-Fiction. Being part of the ACFW has opened my eyes to so much and I am learning from some pretty amazing people. I think after I attend the conference in September I will have a better understanding of just where I am to be and what I am to do. Maybe I am not to publish a book at all. Maybe I am to continue this ministry. I just am not sure. I know I have a story to tell. We all do. But I am not sure as how to tell my story. It would be amazing to do it through a Fiction series, but also opening my heart and being transparent in a Non-Fiction area would be equally amazing. Do you see my dilemma? Have you too felt this struggle before?

God has been opening door after door for me and I am so humbled by His presence in my life. His guidance is everything. In writing we can get caught up in so much. We tend to look over and see how many people are stopping in. We place our acceptance on those comments below. We judge our ministry by the emails we receive. Ah, it sounds like there are times we can just be stuck in that place of, "What do others think of my writing?" I don't want to be in that place. Sure, it is nice and humbling to hear from others. It is wonderful to hear from your readers just how they have been blessed by what they have read. I find it overwhelmingly awesome that a person can just stop by out of the blue on a night when they just happen to come across something that is what they needed to hear. When you hear their story that is just more of a confidence you are where you are suppose to be in your writing. With that being said, I want to be in a place where I am totally searching God's will and His leading. I want to be totally surrendered to His voice and not my own.

I want to be totally transparent and there is so much to share. So, how much do you share? My son asked me last night, "Mom, if I tell my story do you know how many people will judge me?" My answer to him was, "Is it more important for one person to hear your message and be changed or is it more important to be concerned with those who might judge?" We spend so much time worrying about what others think of us. That is so sad. Really. When we reach heaven and we see Jesus face to face I want to be able to say, "Lord, I have used up everything You gave me." When I meet Jesus face to face those people who judged will not be standing there next to me. I find that comforting. I should be more concerned with how my Father in heaven sees me. Does He see a girl on fire for Him or does He see me floating somewhere between the lines of faith and this world? We cannot walk with one foot in faith and one foot in this world. We must make a decision. My decision is to totally live for Jesus and I want that to shine through my writing. After all, this is His gift and I am humbled to receive it.

What is He calling you to do? Where is He calling you to go? There are those times we must take a step back and do a heart check. My heart aches to know Him more. I want to dig into His Word even deeper and write with a new vision. So friends, please be patient with me as I travel on this journey into the unknown. I just want to make sure I don't make a left turn where I am to make a right one.